Musings of a pregnant mother on the subway; why are pregnant women not being offered seats ?!

August 14, 2015

It's been six years since I've done the daily subway commute thing. An occasional morning trip here or there, but thanks to the flexibly of being a stay home mom, I'd always make mid day appointments so I wouldn't have to deal with the crowds.

Last week I failed my one hour glucose test. Bummer. So I had to return to my doctor for the three hour test. Last week I had *treated* myself to a cab ride. It wasn't that pleasant. Traffic was insane. I was hot. It was stop and go. So, I said I'll take the train today. So feeling large, pregnant, and hot, I took a bus to the train. I stood. Then I got on the L platform and had to wait for four trains. Two skipped the station and the other two were so packed. After two men pushed me aside, I made it on. I stood. Then I transferred to the 6 where I stood.

I'm usually a super independent person. I never wait for a door to be opened for me. Or when my kids were younger and we took a stroller on the subway, I never expected anyone to help me.

But on a 90 degree day. An obviously pregnant woman (who has been fasting no less!) is being pushed aside, I can't help but wonder what is up?!  Six years ago I had seats offered to me left and right. Even with the tiniest bump, men and women were offering me their seat. Has the neighborhood become so crowded that everyone desires a seat after waiting several trains?  Have we lost our manners while we are distracted by our phones?

I'm trying to raise my son with the idea that it's ladies first (as old fashioned as that seems). He will hold the door for me and my daughter. He will let one of us use the restroom first. I'm teaching him to respect women. And even with my daughter, I'm trying to show her how someone else may come before her. A younger child. An elderly person.  Basically I'm trying to teach my children that they world does not revolve around them. We are a group of humans, all trying to get where we need to be. But maybe, we might offer a seat to someone along the way.

Post by Erica Young



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